I didn't realize that little girls have emotional breakdowns before they get anywhere near their teenage years. No one warned me about that. Maybe I could have been a little more prepared...then again, probably not.
Map folding. I'm pretty sure that wasn't the phrase you expected to see next. But that's what triggered the meltdown. I'm serious. She fell apart because she couldn't fold a map while riding in the back seat of the car. To me, and it's not like I would know or anything, but to me, that sounds like the kind of irrational collapse that happens when you are PMSed or pregnant. Not when you are four. You are not supposed to have that many hormones running through you when you are four.
So I called Michael and asked him to talk to her, to see if he could maybe calm her down. Just a little. It worked for about two miles. Then she remembered she couldn't fold a map and the tears took over again. And I might have laughed a time or two. Maybe. And that might have made the situation a little bit worse. But honest, it was really, really funny. Map folding??? Is anyone good at map folding?
In a moment of clarity, she said the following to Michael on the phone. (read with big sobs and lots of sadness.)
Daddy, my head is all mixed up.
My light bulb isn't working and I need to get a new one.
That pretty much sums it up. She just needs a new light bulb. Maybe my dad can get her a good deal.